For anyone who has been paying any attention at all, you will have seen the decline in my cycling. It’s been one heck of a ride and I learned so many things along the way. With the Paris 2024 games weeks away, I definitely thought that I would be packing my bags and getting ready for the trip of a lifetime. Unfortunately that’s not how things have worked out. The bike was always a love of mine and how I got around for years while walking. When I got injured I saw it as a new journey and vehicle to get me to where I want to go. Over the past 10 years I made great strides working with 2 coaches. I started slow and on my own. When I started working with my first Coach Mirek, he opened my eyes to cycling and climbing mountains. When I transitioned to a para Coach Blaine I hit the “B” National time standard putting me in a pretty good spot to get my foot in the door with the Canadian National Team. When you hit a national time standard it’s a pretty big deal. Without getting into the nitty gritty of it, I signed papers to Team Canada’s development program, received national carding money and knew that I was on a great track although my gut was telling me otherwise. 

When I first started cycling the camaraderie was amazing and I loved getting out on the bike. My love slowly turned into a job which was fine because I still loved it but the job didn’t pay and it cost a lot to ride a bike properly. Fortunately I have always had an amazing support system and through sponsorships, fundraisers, donations and kind hearted people I was able to cycle and pursue my goal of the Paralympics. As I was getting faster as a cyclist, some major issues persisted that I just couldn’t get over, one being puking and two, being in pain more than not.

 My consistency and discipline on the bike definitely could have been better but when it came to those rough pain days from a spinal cord injury and not training, it was extremely difficult. When I would be in great shape pounding out a time trial and inevitably start to puke, my race was over. When I rode, I would puke 7-8 times out of every 10 rides. This was honestly one of the most frustrating things I have had to deal with in my life. I tried to get help from various sources and no one could help me. Like…I even got an endoscopy plus the other one from the bottom but there was no real source of the issue.

 I recently found out that my abdomen right where I can feel/start to lose feeling will go into spasm and just lock right up. I’ve felt it before but I didn’t realize it stayed locked up below where I could feel. When the therapist at the Tennis tournament a few months ago told me and released the spasm, I could breathe and within minutes the pain in my back was gone. I felt like a new person. Before I found out about any of this I had a feeling my cycling career was coming to an end.

 In 2020 I had to make the decision to continue or hang up my…wheels lol It was a difficult decision but I knew that I had many more opportunities if I rode than if I didn’t. I heard a quote the other day that said “Do what you have to until you can do what you want to.” The bike was always a vehicle for me. It was a vehicle for fitness and joy from the limitations of my wheelchair. It was freedom and excitement finding new trails and descending mountains. It was one of my first loves but when it became my job and things weren’t going well I wasn’t even close to being in love. I didn’t even want to ride. When I speak to audiences all over I tell people that if they are not happy in their current situation, they have the power and ability to change it. With enough willpower, perseverance and strength you can change almost any situation that you find yourself in. When I looked in the mirror I knew that I needed change. My cycling scholarship to the University of Arizona was interrupted when the coach “retired”, and we will leave that there. I know myself as a person and a student. If I wanted to go to Paris, I should have never attended school. However, I did manage to graduate with a 3.0 and making the Dean’s list!

There is so much more to the story but to keep it short I will say that I had an amazing experience going to the U of A as a Division 1 scholarship athlete starting cycling and finishing up as a runner up in the National Championships in the “C” division for wheelchair Tennis. I’ve been blessed to be able to pursue cycling and the ultimate goal of the Paralympics for over 10 years. I honestly didn’t see myself not being at the Paralympics but the calling I have now is much greater.

 Accessibility, disability, diversity, inclusion are all things that I am super passionate about. This is my daily life and I encounter biases and stigma not only in my daily life but also in sport as well. When it came to the National team, it seemed as if the coaches didn’t want me around…I was passed up for camps by lesser athletes and after signing papers for their development program you would expect to hear something…some sort of communication or congratulations. To this day all that I know is that in 2020 it was a Paralympic year and they were focusing on the team which is completely understandable. I didn’t hear anything after the games and then covid hit…I still don’t know what happened to the Canadian National Para-cycling development team or if there is even one today. There were so many things going on in the background that led to my ultimate decision of stepping back from cycling and competitive sport. 

Although I have an amazing life, I am nowhere close to where I want to be. I have an accessibility consulting business and a non-profit to grow. My passion for automobiles and race cars has never left me and I am already actively helping to move the needle forward in the automotive industry. There really aren’t a few minutes in a day that I don’t think about cars. As I’ve said many times before I am blessed beyond measure and so happy to be able to lead the life that I do today. So what’s next?! Good question…I guess you’ll have to wait and see!